Dad

On 2005-05-05, my dad had been confirmed with nasopharyngeal cancer stage 3, going to stage 4.
He had gone through the usual chemotheraphy and radiotheraphy, also brachytherapy as a boost.
As the years go passing by, side effects of high-dose therapy started to occur.
Firstly, epiglottis malfunction. The foods entered into his lung frequently and caused lung infection. So, his doctor had recommended him on gastrostomy tube feeding.
Secondly, muffling and difficulty in delivering speech (probably due to the malfunction of epiglottis).
This had affected him very much because my dad was still active in his business.
Thirdly, difficulty in breathing. He had tracheostomy.
Lastly, change from gastrostomy to nasogastric tube feeding, due to the frequent infection around his stomach.
All of these problems had faced by him prior to the recurrent nasopharyngeal cancer. None of us would understand the sufferings he had gone through, even though he had fought the battle against cancer.

On September 2016, he had his first seizure happened in the night and all of us were freaked out.
We sent him to the hospital, we did MRI scan on brain. At that time, THERE WAS A BRAIN TUMOUR FORMING (according to the second neurologist). However, the first neurologist told us that it was just an ordinary epilepsy and he prescribed dilantin to my dad, also, the same neurologist said no more appointment for my dad, after a few visits.
My dad knew it was not as simple as an ordinary epilepsy, my dad felt slightly down, so my mom fixed another appointment with another neurologist. The another neurologist suggested that it was fit/seizure. Until the moment when my dad had difficulty in hearing, severe dizzy, abnormal eye movements and change in vision etc, my mom decided to send him for eye specialist and the eye specialist detected some abnormal changes on my dad.
I must mention the point that TWO NEUROLOGISTS COULD NOT DETECT THE SYMPTOMS OF BRAIN CANCER ON MY DAD BASED ON BASIS OBSERVATIONS. Even an uneducated aunt like my mom, could have seen that there were somethings wrong with the brain.

Upon the confirmation of recurrent cancer, my dad had started chemotherapy. However, as you have read, he had not been taking solid foods for many years, all he had was purely liquid foods such as milk. His body was not capable of receiving therapy. After the second treatment of chemotherapy, my dad had passed away due to the extremely low white blood cells count in his body.

It's still hard for me to accept the fact that he had gone.

Now, the problems are with his family members during his funeral. I would like to express my disappointment to them in Chinese.

你们，这些所谓的亲人，没有在他离开人间的第一时间来帮忙无助的我们。讲的时候，一流；做的时候，九流！葬礼的第一天，这么多的亲戚当中，只有4个人来参加。
第一件事，也是最重要的事，你们一张金纸都没有为我爸折一张，就连烧一张金纸也没有。这一点，我不觉得我有说错什么，因为外人（爸爸的员工，爸爸的娘家亲友，我们家的邻居）都有在折金纸。所以这一点，我能确定，你们失职！
第二，你们一见到我们，就开口问“屋子怎样啊？”“财产分配如何？”I am like WTF!?不问我爸爸的状况就算，直接就问财产/公司，你们这些冷血的人到底是什么星球的人！
再来，第三，封棺仪式竟然人影都不见一个！？连女司仪都跑出来找男方亲人，你们这班无情无理的亲人到底去了哪里！？我真的为我爸感到失望，真是他妈的失望！
竟然在封棺仪式大大迟到！看到你们迟到就算了，你们一个两个需不需要这么的隆重打扮！？穿名牌球鞋+一身高级的黑色套装！

昨天是他的二七，我竟然梦到我爸爸问我“阿钦，爸爸的亲戚有没有来？” 我仿佛觉得他在封棺之前，还没看到他的亲人。也因为棺木被封了，所以他看不到他的兄弟姐妹有没有来送他一程。

我想说，我真的没有在讲衰/破坏我爸的亲戚。以上足已证明，我爸的亲人真的是他妈的烂！

Bouquet

I do know that Valentine's Day is approaching.
To be frank, I neither like flowers nor teddy bear.
I am honestly have no idea what to do with flowers AND teddy bear is definitely not my favourite.
Flowers will wilt and die.

The first time I got a flower bouquet was from my mom during my primary school graduation ceremony.
I felt embarrassed of holding the flower bouquet.
After that, I have never receive bouquet anymore because people who are closed to me know I dislike flowers or they acknowledge the fact that I am not a feminine.

What about teddy bears?
I never appreciate a teddy bear.
Teddy bear is so disgusting, to me.

BF was asking me what do I want for Valentine's Day gift.
I answered Nothing, repeatedly as he was non-stop asking me "WHAT DO YOU WANT?"
He suggested "Flowers?" I replied "No!"
Later, the radio announcer said that she hates getting teddy bears. I told my bf that I was agreed with her.
He was slightly annoyed with it. *I didn't know he was actually hiding flower bouquet+small teddy bear in his boot*

He surprised me with it before I was getting out of his car, while we were on the way back to my home.
My eyes were literally tearing up.
I told him I felt so sorry for telling him HONESTLY that I dislike flowers and teddy bears.
He was unlucky too because he got scolded by me of wasting money on unnecessary stuffs.

This is the first Valentine Bouquet I have received in my life.
Thank you, for creating such an unforgettable memory.

Okay, so now, the question is, How can I preserve those flower petals when the flower wilts?